Society has undergone a transformative shift in the past few years, reshaping not only relationships but also the qualities we seek in a partner.
According to renowned biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher , who shared her insights on the Open Relationships podcast, “You can’t lock up somebody for two years and have them come out the same.”
Fisher, a key contributor to the annual Singles In America study, observed a significant change in partner preferences. “Emotional maturity has climbed the ranks of desirable traits,” she noted. The pandemic seemed to magnify what people found lacking in their partners and relationships, leading to a shift in priorities.
Traditionally, women have been drawn to “bad boys,” a preference rooted in evolutionary factors.
“(Bad boys) are charismatic. They’re probably high dopamine and high testosterone, ” Fisher explained.
What Women Want
However, she also pointed out a shift in this trend since the pandemic, supported by data.
The Singles In America study of 2022 revealed a new focus on emotional wellness among singles. An impressive 87% of participants emphasized the importance of mental health for both partners, with two-thirds being open to therapy. Love at first sight and immediate attraction have given way to a more thoughtful approach, where individuals take the time to understand their potential partners on a deeper level.
Interestingly, the study found that 49% of singles had fallen in love with someone they weren’t initially attracted to, indicating a move towards valuing emotional connections over superficial traits.
The question now is whether this trend will endure. Considering that 2/3 of singles are actively working on improving their mental health and 81% engage in regular self-care, it seems likely that partners who prioritize emotional intelligence and well-being will be the ones to watch.
The transformation of “bad boys” into emotionally intelligent men represents a charismatic and confident evolution. As Fisher aptly put it, “Self-confidence is the main thing somebody wants in a partner,” emphasizing the enduring appeal of emotional maturity in a relationship.
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